Willemstad, Curacao June 28 2008 - 11:55am: US & Dutch intelligence assets monitoring Venezuelan and Colombian air & passenger traffic report that a person fitting the description of a certain Wolfgang B from E in G (plus 10 pounds) has just set foot on Curacao again carrying large (yet legal) amounts of alcohol, tobacco, perfume, electronics as well as a big smile . Subsequent signals report that the suspect has since then been sighted at various "Hot-Spots' around the island at various levels of inebriation and dancing skills. When questioned, the local Anonymous Alcoholics group as well as the Conglomerate of Dutch Island Beauties (which for some reason seem to be partly the same individuals) expressed joy about the fact that they now don't have to provide sarcastic comments themselves anymore and that it (along with accelerating hair loss) can be left to a seasoned professional again. There was also widespread relief that the vacant smart ass position is now filled again.